Insights
The PAUSE Method: how to handle conflict in the moment
Conflict rarely arrives on schedule. A comment lands wrong, and you have seconds to respond. PAUSE is a five-step method for exactly those moments.
P — Pause
Before you react, take one breath. That single beat is the difference between a response you choose and one you regret.
A — Acknowledge
Name what's happening, even quietly to yourself: "This landed hard." Acknowledgment lowers the temperature and buys you room to think.
U — Understand
Get curious about what's underneath. Ask a question instead of making a case. Most heated moments are protecting something the other person hasn't said yet.
S — Speak
Respond from your own experience, not an accusation. "I" statements keep the door open where "you" statements slam it shut.
E — Evaluate
Afterward, reflect: what worked, what didn't, and what you'd do differently. Conflict skill is built one moment at a time.
Want to practice PAUSE with your team? It's part of Conflict Evolution 101.